If You Can Read This, You're Too Fucking Close

$44.95

Honestly, I’m just waiting for the day when we get an email that says - “Omg. I saw someone read my bangle and they got all flustered and backed the fuck off.” Yep. 

That’s why we made it. 

1.5m people - HOW HARD IS THAT TO UNDERSTAND? 

If You Can Read This, You’re Too Fucking Close. 

Super relevant right now due to the social distancing (obvs), but also super relevant for your office mate Tim who leans in too close when speaking to you. Or people who stand too close while you’re in an elevator. Or for your partner when they are just not getting the drift that you want a lil’ space. We don’t recommend showing it to your kids. But hey, you do you.

This bang is all you need to let them know to back off. 

So flash it whenever you think it’s needed. Watch people’s reactions as they squint and read it (most likely aloud to you) ‘If You Can Read This, You’re Too Fucking Close.’

Wear it as a reminder of this (maybe blissful, or maybe painful) time where your personal space was a sacred thing and essential to keep you and the peeps you love safe. 

And one day, when you’re 80 years old, and you sit down and pull your little grandson Jimmy onto your lap, and he asks - “Why do you have a bangle that says that grandma?” You can say, “Buckle up kiddo. I’m going to tell you about a crazy fucking year. It started with something called a Coronavirus. It was the year 2020...”

All our bangles are currently pre-order only. It will be around a  3 - 4 weeks wait before they will be shipped from placement of order.

Please note that there may be delivery delays due to Auspost having an overloaded system & COVID restrictions. 

Orders dispatched Monday, Wednesday & Friday mornings Melbourne time.

We offer Free Shipping (2 - 5 business days delivery) for all Australian orders! 

You can upgrade to Express Post (1 - 3 days business days delivery) for just $6.95!

Internationally:
It takes 3 - 5 weeks to be delivered, and you can track your order through Australia Post. Shipping starts at $15. 

Please note that due to current COVID restrictions we are unable to ship our bangles to places in Africa, South America, and Central America. We are really sorry about this and hope this will change in the new year.

You'll find a shipping calculator on checkout for further details. 

Returns & Exchanges

Our bangles are designed to make you feel happy, empowered and freakin' awesome - so if there is a problem, we gotta fix it!

If you've accidentally ordered the wrong size or are not happy with your bangle, we'll be happy refund you, and then you can order the correct one! For more details you can read our returns & exchanges policy.

Product details

Our bangles are made with love from high quality stainless steel. They are 100% hypoallergenic, and nickel & lead free.

Size & Fit

If you're not sure what size to choose please use our sizing chart to help you find your way. You'll need to measure the widest part of your hand / knuckle circumference, while your hand is mooshed. (And yes, mooshed is a word). 

If you're still totally stuck, we recommend that you purchase a regular size bangle. We do offer exchanges if it doesn't fit!

Clasp bangles

Thinking of getting one of our clasp style bangles? Great! The clasp style bangle  eliminates the need for you to base your sizing on your hand. It can be stretched out to fit over wrists instead, woo! It's a regular size (63.7mm) when closed. 

The clasp fits around 80% of people so it is perfect for gifting!

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